So baby boy, so much has happened and so much has changed these last few weeks. Yet, nothing really seems different at all. I've had bad weeks and good weeks, but all in all I think I'm okay.
I originally wrote this blog to share my thoughts and feelings with you, but now I think it is time to move in a different direction. I don't love you any less, or not want to talk to you anymore, but I think I am finally strong enough to talk to you out loud. Yes, I never thought I would say that, but it is true. It has been almost 6 months now, so Daddy and I are going to build you a garden so we can sit and chat. I'm sure it sounds silly to some people, but I am so excited. I will have a place all my own to sit and think of you. We will make it beautiful, just wait and see!
Your cousin Dakota turns 3 this weekend so we will be spending some of Sunday with him. Your other cousin Benjamin has a baseball game (that I would have LOVED to take you to) tomorrow, so we will be spending it with him. Your big sister Marleigh has a soccer game tonight, so we will be spending it with her. We both have a busy few days coming up, but I am glad. Mommy has been having some personal issues, so it will be nice to get out and have something else on my mind.
I will still be posting here, but it will be updates on the family, and future happenings to share with everyone. Mommy has a job where something new and crazy happens every day, so I'm sure there will be plenty to talk about. It just takes a toll on the body to dwell on sadness, so I am trying to move ahead and to stay positive. I will never forget you, replace you, or stop thinking about you.
I love you more than you could ever imaging, and I am still waiting for you. I can't wait to meet you again. I have so much to tell you and so much to teach you. I will see you again soon. Love you so much.
Mommy
I'm glad you will have a special garden for your little boy. I have a little space in our flower beds that I call Carleigh's Corner. It has a little concrete bench and a couple of other concrete statues. I can't wait to plant some beautiful flowers in that area this year. Last year I didn't plant anything.
ReplyDeleteIt does take a toll to dwell on sadness, which is why I focus on being happy and making the most of each day. I guess it helps that I'm a naturally positive/optimistic person anyway.
I love that....Carleigh's corner. I'm sure it is beautiful. We did plant some beautiful flowers, and we also found a baby angel statue that we put in it. I haven't finished it yet, but I love it already.
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